There is a family which lives right below us on the 3rd floor, had heard about the domestic violence and wife beating that goes on even before I had shifted in. An ex collegue used to live in the house we are in and she had also tried to intervene, counselled the wife, took her to the police station, but the woman finally said that she does not wish to pursue a complaint against 'her man'.
It has happened once or twice before that there has been crazy screaming and shouting coming from the floor below and I have just stood there feeling totally helpless!! Last night it happened again, this time I could'nt take it, I had to do something.. so after a lot of this and that, we decided to call the police. It was amzing as in this situation, there are so many things you think of, like we are three girls, we live alone and all that jazz, but finally I thought what the hell, i am going to do something to get this man to stop. Finally a policewalla turned up and after a lot of head scratching and some directions from us hanging from our terrace parapit, he finally managed to come upto the right house and ring the bell. We all opened our door and stood in the stairway to hear whats going on. All that I got was that the husband kept saying that it is my house and my wife and if we both deicde to fight and beat each other up why should anyone else have a problem?
To this all that the policewalla said was just don't make too much noise, if we get another complaint about the noise we will take action......??????? I was so tempted to go and inform the man that no he cannot beat up another human being just like that, she is not his property, it is against the law and all that, but then i heard the woman speak and she said that I am happy with this man, no we never fight and he has always been by my side!! I just didnt know what to do. Its not like its the first time I have seen the woman turn around like this.. it has happened before with clients on whose cases you would've worked like hell...but it was like a defeat in some sense, then there was this whole aspect of she choosing to live like that, but then really..who in their right mind would given a choice choose this, and thats where the point lies, given a choice, is there really a choice? Or maybe for her this is all life means, this is what she had been taught, adjust, stay putt, there is no other way, she does'nt know that another life is possible because she has given up any hope of there being anything else, this is it, this is her life, it just brings me back to feeling completely helpless, what is to be done, leave it or fight it?
2 comments:
Congratulations for whatever actions you took...on the flip side, I thought you were very tentative....How about creating something powerfully? One way could be to enroll the lady(you know the jazz....starting from B.O.Relatedness) in HER OWN LIFE.....You CREATE a person in YOUR listening...ARE YOU WILLING TO LISTEN TO HER? POWERFULLY? CONSISTENTLY? TILL SHE IS EMPOWERED?.......Time to flex your transformational muscles....
Lemme know, If you want more jazz (seriously, whatever I could do to help)!
After a certain age, people ahve to learn to help themselves. If she can't then she deserves whats coming to her. I know this sounds callous but I believe that if you don't have a shred of self respect in you then, you're worth nothing. People HAVE tried to help her, no? And she doesn't need help...
Then again, maybe they are one of those weirdos who get off on being abusive and abused
Vot a silly vorld vee live in!
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